wikialityfandomcom-20200214-history
The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 471
Production Info Intro The Greatetst Prank Ever * Dr. Colbert pulled the greatest prank yesterday, after smearing all the door knobs with chicken, the staff were so taken with the prank, they were all hospitalized ** with salmonella * McCain revealed that he's pulled a trick on all his supporters, because no one expects it from a guy like McCain because he is so deadpan ** or nearly dead * when your taxes go up, it's tragedy ** when it happens to the poor, it's comedy * what about the time he picked Sarah Palin ** Stephen gets it now * he's so old ** there's a good chance she'll be president * it all makes sense * like a flaming bag of dog poop dropped on America's doorstep! Disturbing Trend * many members of the Republican party have been endorsing Barack Obama ** the latest, former Massachusetts governor William Weld * McCain has a first class temperament ** rabid badger in first class * do not want to be late with his warm nuts * Weld is the tip of the iceberg * not because 90% GOP are underwater * other prominent republicans who have endorsed Obama: ** Susan Eisenhower ** Colin Powell ** Scott McClellan ** Ken Adelman ** Yosemite Sam *** he clings bitterly to his guns ]] * Stephen will respond ** Tonight's Word: I Endorse Barack Obama * shocking and Heroes are angry * solution to a crisis ** they're getting attention and Stephen isn't * media need to cover this is been * should be talking about Stephen ** took real courage * Dr. Colbert looks good in bold * find out about Obama's relationship with chupacabra ** launched his political career in chupacabra's lagoon * Stephen hopes to get a job driving the tractor of America's collective farm * Stephen won't be voting for him * In Japan, Stephen endorses a drink, but won't drink it ** it makes you poop Hello Kitties * Stephen encourages McCain to endorse Barack Obama ** it will make him look like a Maverick Was It Really That Bad? * 71st anniversary of Stock Market Crash of 1929 ** McCain moved his ads to the Pennysaver Was It Really That Bad? * moments of optimism ** Hoover quote * Hoover voted with Hoover almost 90% of the time * solution to shortage of affordable homes: Hoovervilles ** original gated communities, homes made from discarded gates * deep cuts to education, gave children great games to play: ** "Rock, Paper, Nothing" ** "Duck, Duck, Work In A Cannery" ** "Hop Scotch" * Great radio shows ** "Inspector Shadow" Interview * David Simon ** television producer of "The Wire" and "Generation Kill" * used to be a newspaper man ** it chewed him up and spit him out * newspapers got obsessed with prizes * has never won an Emmy ** Stephen allowed him to touch his * you can kill your enemies with the wingtips of the Emmy * he was a police reporter * his shows moral ambiguity confuses Dr. Colbert * only Woody Guthrie and Dick Cheney conform to pure good and good evil * forces Joe The Drug Dealer to spread his wealth around * he is a socialist * called capitalism a pyramid scheme * Stephen plans to have himself buried in a pyramid with all his interns ** they'll get college credit * Teddy Roosevelt came up with progressive tax * earned income credit came from Ronald Reagan * Generation Kill ** mini series is over ** war continues, but ratings are down Epilogue * Dr. Colbert completists this is episode 4140, but the epilogue was originally written for episode 4127 ** don't throw away your DVDs ** don't freak about the ending, it was for one of the Saturday shows, which you don't see anyway Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments